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Monday, April 16, 2012

Rentaclists, erraticlists and suicyclists

Returning to work after an Easter break in France, which was more like work than a break, I notice that spring is bringing the occasional cyclists back onto the roads.  And I can't quite decide whether they are worse than the hardened, semi-professional traffic light deniers who commute into London every day.

But it reminded me of some words I invented with Becci and some friends some time ago and think should be added to the lexicon, which I offer to you as some post holiday levity.

Rentaclist, n an individual who takes advantage of the Barclays Boris Bike scheme in London

Erraticlist, n an occasional cyclist who does not use hand signals, or look over their shoulder except on rare occasions and wanders erratically and without warning between traffic lanes, generally at slow speeds

Psyclist, n a committed and extreme cycling commuter who has become so self absorbed as to fail to notice any other authority than their own whether traffic signals, other road users or the highway code. Psyclists will only interact with other humans in the same way that they ride; aggressively, fast and with thinly disguised contempt.

Suicyclist, n an extreme form of any of the above who has taken their art to the brink of self-extinction

Hope you all had a good Easter break!

PS I should admit that I am a Vespa rider so invent others to contribute their own definitions of motorised cyclists